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The Commandment We Forgot, by Tim Challies (a Cruciform Quick booklet)
We are all children, we ought to pursue God’s blessings, and we need to give prominence to God’s prominent command. For these reasons, we can no longer ignore the forgotten commandment.
This commandment is not just for children. Rather, it pertains to the whole of life and to every person of every age. In the home, the church, and the workplace, it provides a stable foundation for all of society. Yet, we often neglect it and fail to appreciate its relevance to our lives. It is the commandment we forgot.
This booklet is a brief exploration of the fifth commandment: Honor your father and your mother. It answers important questions relevant to every Christian: Does this commandment expire when we move out of our parents’ home and gain our independence? Does it cease being relevant once we are married? Is obedience synonymous with honor? Do we need to be prepared to provide for them financially? What if our parents are especially difficult or unworthy of respect?
My hope is that this booklet will restore the centrality of the fifth commandment, even and especially to adults. Let’s look together to the Bible and, ultimately, to Jesus Christ as the perfect fulfillment of the commandment we forgot.
–Tim Challies
Author
Tim Challies is a Christian, a husband to Aileen, and a father to three children aged 9 to 15. He is a book reviewer for WORLD magazine, a co-founder of Cruciform Press, and has written several books including The Discipline of Spiritual Discernment and Sexual Detox. He worships and serves as a pastor at Grace Fellowship Church in Toronto, Ontario and writes daily at www.challies.com.
Aaron Lee –
As a young parent, I have given much thought to the fifth commandment: Honor your father and mother. What will this look like in our home? What should I expect of my kids?
And maybe more importantly: How do I make sure I am obeying this command as I relate to my own parents? In The Commandment We Forgot, Tim Challies explains how we can all seek to obey this commandment and honor our parents.
Honor Versus Obey
At just around 50 pages, Challies takes 7 chapters to help us think through this issue. He first reminds us that the Bible tells us to honor our parents, not necessarily to obey them. We look at Jesus who was able to do both so well, and he is our example and our Savior for when we fall short.
What I appreciated most about Challies’ writing is his ability to speak about how different cultures honor their parents. He highlights a culture of autonomy versus a culture of authority, and he makes it clear that we must think through these issues carefully and Biblically.
Practical for Parents
This book is practical, and the tips he gives us for honoring our parents are to forgive them, speak well of them, esteem them publicly and privately, seek their wisdom, support them, and provide for them. He goes into detail, especially in how they relate to matters of money.
I appreciate how Challies acknowledges the different family dynamics that play a role in what obeying this command may look like. As our first son was adopted, this book helped me gain a helpful perspective on the different positions and relationships at play. The book ends with a call to parents to be worthy of honor. I am challenged as a young parent to pursue it with all of my might.
I received a media copy of The Commandment We Forgot and this is my honest review.