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Sexual Detox: A Guide for Guys Who are Sick of Porn, by Tim Challies
Endorsed by Kevin DeYoung, Tedd Tripp, Owen Strachan, and more
A huge percentage of men need a porn detox, a moral and psychological reset. Do you? If so, whether you know it or not, pornography has corrupted your thinking, weakened your conscience, warped your sense of right and wrong, and twisted your understanding and expectations of sexuality. You need a reset by the One who created sex.
But here’s a promise. You’ll never stop until the sin is more horrifying to you than the commission of the sin is enjoyable. That means you need more grace.
This book can help you reorient your understanding of sex, both in the big picture and in the act itself, according to God’s plan for this great gift. God will meet you with grace as you act to cut off the porn and begin the reset.
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This is not an easy process. It is rarely a quick process. It involves a letting go of old realities and an embrace of a new normal. To be willing to go through it you need to see how bad your current situation really is, and how the path you are on leads no place good. You need to see that the path of porn leads only to more isolation, guilt, alienation, and pain.
Whether single or married, such a reset to normal is the only thing that can ever equip you to become a pure, loving, attentive, sacrificial husband. But you already know you need to change. Few Christian men indulge in porn without realizing they need to quit. Every Christian guy who looks at porn wants to stop, but many of us want to stop just a little bit less than we want to keep going.
The problem isn’t knowledge. It’s desire and ability. So sin prevails.
Here’s a promise. You’ll never stop until you begin to see the monstrous nature of the sin you’re committing. You’ll never stop until the sin is more horrifying to you than the commission of the sin is enjoyable. You’ll need to hate that sin before you can find freedom from it. That means you need more grace. You need to cry out to be changed and to see the monstrous nature of this sin.
And then you need to behave in faith that God will meet you with grace as you act to cut off the porn and begin the reset.
—Tim Challies
Author
Tim Challies is a Christian, a husband to Aileen, and a father to three teenage children. He is a co-founder of Cruciform Press and has written several books. He worships and serves as a pastor at Grace Fellowship Church in Toronto, Ontario and writes daily at www.challies.com.
Endorsements
“I want every man I serve and all the guys on our staff to read this book.”
—Tedd Tripp
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“Tim Challies strikes just the right balance in this necessary work. His assessment of the sexual epidemic in our culture is sober but not without hope. His advice is practical but avoids the checklist mentality. His discussion of sexual sin is Frank without being inappropriate. This book will be a valuable resource.”
—Kevin DeYoung, Pastor and author
“In an era in which every man is online, pornography is not just a problem for Christian men; it is THE problem. All men face the temptation of this mind polluting, heart-hardening, soul-deadening sin. Many men, young and old, in our churches need Sexual Detox. This is a welcomed book. In a short, compressed format Challies identifies the toxic nature of this sin and offers practical, doable and, above all, gospel-centered hope for men. I want every man I serve and all the guys on our staff to read this book.”
—Tedd Tripp, Pastor, Grace Fellowship Church, Hazle Township, Pennsylvania; Conference Speaker and author of Shepherding a Child’s Heart and Instructing a Child’s Heart
“The church, the bride of Christ, finds itself in a sexual age. Much as we Christians might struggle to accept this, sex is very nearly the dominant cultural currency of our day. Because we know that this is a perversion of God’s good plan, we might struggle to accept this reality—and to confront it as we must. Sexual Detox is just what we need. It is clear, honest, and biblical, written with a tone that is knowing but kind, exhortative but gracious, realistic but determined. Those of us who work with youth—the target market in the sex-saturated society—have been given by Tim Challies a terrific resource for fighting sin and exalting Christ. We are in Tim’s debt. Here’s hoping that this book and its emphasis on confrontational holiness will spread far and wide for the health of the church and the strengthening of marriages both temporal and divine.”
—Owen Strachan, Instructor of Christian Theology and Church History, Boyce College; Co-author of Essential Edwards Collection
“Thank God for using Tim to articulate simply and unashamedly the truth about sex amidst a culture of permissiveness. This book is simple and biblical in its approach to “detox” us of the lies we hold onto in this area of sexuality. Read it and believe it.”
—Ben Zobrist, All-Star Right Fielder, Tampa Bay Rays
“Tim has worked hard to express these truths simply. You can thank us for that. He has seen from teaching us that we are simple guys who need a simple explanation of God’s desires for our sexuality. We are convinced that if you are a normal guy with normal guy problems and a normal guy worldview, this book will be helpful for you, as it has been for us.”
—John Cowle, Steve Funston, Nick Mitchell, and Julian Freeman, twenty-something guys from the church in Toronto where Tim Challies is a pastor (From the Foreword)
Blog Review (verified owner) –
Open and frank without crossing the line into being crude.
In his book, Sexual Detox, Tim Challies offers simple, biblical counsel for men who are struggling with the tragic impact of pornography on their sexuality. Challies understands the prevalence and the destructiveness of pornography, and he speaks in his book to the hearts of men who need God’s help to again view sex rightly…
Challies writes in a way that is open and frank without crossing the line into being crude. Often, in a book on this topic, the author, in order to prove he is a real guy with real guy struggles, will share too much with his readers in too descriptive a way. Challies does not fall into this pattern. This is good, as Challies performs the rare feat of talking about issues of lust without stirring up dangerous images in his readers’ minds.
Challies plan of organization in this work is also effective. Before he gets into the nuts and bolts of what men need to do, he spends two chapters helping guys to develop a biblical theology of their sexuality. This is good, as men need to first understand what God has taught on this issue before they can make lasting changes that honor God.
This book is also an extremely easy read. A pastor could give Sexual Detox to a young man who is struggling and not fear that the terminology will be too much. This book could possibly even be used with youth so long as the youth minister or a parent worked with the young men to get through some of the issues in the text.
…[I]f you want a very good book that is shorter and a bit more modern, I would certainly highly recommend Challies’ Sexual Detox. This really is good material to help men recognize the destructiveness of pornography and how they can begin to get away from it.
— Travis Peterson, Travis’ Blog
Lou Tullo (verified owner) –
Theological excellence, concise and engaging prose, and beautiful layout and organization.
As a 23-year-old Christian man living in the 21st century, I can’t help but exclaim about the level of frustration that comes from facing a world saturated with pornographic images and attitudes. Too many churches don’t address issues of sexuality from the pulpit, and those that do often take the approach of focusing on all of the negative commandments of God regarding sex without mentioning his design for its rightful place in our lives. Tim Challies’ Sexual Detox is an amazing resource for young men ranging from the onset of puberty into early early thirties that gets at the heart of God’s design for sex.
This book benefits from its combination of sound and unpatronizing theological excellence, concise and engaging prose, and beautiful layout and organization. Tim puts the Gospel first in his written conversation with readers, giving them a Scriptural basis for practical advice that feels possible in spite of its requirement of diligence and reliance on God’s strength. The way in which he speaks about God’s design of sex within the confines of marriage provides an encouraging basis for overcoming the struggles of lust and pornography. A particularly unique quality of this book that sets it apart from others that try to achieve the same end result is that it’s both a quick read, and that Tim provides a series of questions at the end of each chapter that can be pondered and prayed on long after reading. The questions he asks help personalize the values and principles which he asserts through Scripture. I would recommend this book to every man I know because it deals with a struggle all men face in a way that inspires action to overcome it.
—Lou Tullo
Blog Review (verified owner) –
Packed with great content.
The content of this book is stellar. As a youth pastor, husband, and guy I have read many books that look at the problems addressed in Sexual Detox. Many times these books have great content but always seem to leave you wondering just what the author means. They tend to show the problem and sinful acts of sexual behavior but never draw a hard and fast biblical line as to what can and can’t be done. Sexual Detox not only calls sin for what it is, a blatant offense to a glorious God, but it also confronts the many ‘gray’ areas we often try to hide in.
Sexual Detox is not only firmly biblical, but also immensely practical. This book can be of great help to men who have struggled, are struggling, or could struggle (which is all of us) with pornography, masturbation, or a distorted view of their sexuality. The questions at the end of each chapter make it ideal for use in an adult men’s small group or fight club. In this sex-drenched world this little book can help bring a biblical view of manhood and sexuality to those who are struggling.
I can see this book as being a great tool for the following,
* Husbands and wives to read through and think through together
* Personal study
* A group of married guys to study through
* A group of college aged guys to study through
* Pre-marital preparation for men
* It can also be a great tool to be passed out to men who have known struggles
I am planning on using Sexual Detox in my premarital counseling and am also working on a way to use it with some of the guys in my ministry. I would highly encourage you to purchase Sexual Detox; it may help save your marriage and bring greater glory unto Jesus!
— Josh Cousineau
Blog Review (verified owner) –
Profound and insightful truth statements on every page.
I’ve only been blogging for a little over a year and one of the commitments I made to myself and to my blogging endeavor (whatever that means) was to point men to biblical resources that will help them in their personal fight against pornography. Hence, the reason for this post. Tim Challies is his new book, Sexual Detox: A Guide for Guys who are Sick of Porn, shares biblically, forthrightly, convictionally, and passionately about how men can rightly fight against pornography….There’s profound and insightful truth statements on every page that prompted me moment after moment to go “wow” and to incessantly jot notes down in the margins or circle/underline statements.
— Nathan Millican’s Blog